Parenting by your personality type

Parent to your Personality

As a kid, I was introduced to the Myers Brigs Type Indicator, also known as MBTI. My Dad was interested in this and had a book called Please Understand Me that I read as a teenager, my sister even did a book report on it!

Anyway, I found out my personality type is INTP, the complete opposite to my Mum who is an ENFJ – and this explained a lot about relationship and the issues that caused us to clash. I won’t go into the details about what this means, if you’re interested, check out the link above.

For a matter of interest, the other day I did a Google search on MBTI for parenting styles. I know a lot has been written about MBTI in other areas of life, so I figured something would be written about parenting.

I came across this article, “Exploding the Myth of the Ideal Parent“. Unfortunately the link to the authors website is not  live (or it wasn’t when I checked it out). She makes some excellent points about parenting.

On another website, I found this:

Your type is: intp “The ‘Love of Learning’ Mother”

“I keep the encyclopedia in the kitchen so we can look up things together while we eat.”
* Intellectually curious and patient, the INTP mother relishes those times with a child when they are learning something interesting together. Whether they’re at the zoo or computer terminal, she sparks to answering his or her ‘whys’ with in-depth responses or new knowledge.

* The INTP mother is also objective and introspective. She listens to and discusses children’s ideas and questions as she would those of a peer, fostering self-esteem and confidence. Open and non-directive, she allows children the freedom to do for themselves and quietly encourages them to believe they can do it.

* Independence, autonomy, intellectual development, and self-reliance are probably the INTP’s highest priorities for her children. An avid reader, she naturally imparts an appreciation and love of reading as well.

* Drawn to all types of learning, the INTP may also value her mothering experience for all the new insights about life it provides her.

I found this here. There are also descriptions of other parenting types there too.

This describes me and my parenting style really well, and it gave me the feeling that I was on the right track. Except, now I keep the laptop in the kitchen so we can Google the answers to questions!

According to the same site I got that description, the traditionally “ideal” mother is the ENFJ.

Regardless, I found this description has given me confidence in my own parenting, even though I don’t do most of the things the parenting magazine’s say Mums should do.

The description above may not fit your parenting style, so don’t feel discouraged. Different personality types have different styles. If you are interested in finding out more about your personality type or parenting style, check out some of the links I’ve included as well do a Google search yourself to find tools to find your personality type.

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9 thoughts on “Parenting by your personality type

  1. wow, what an idea!! never thought of the mbti in terms of parenting traits… can’t wait to read more from your links.

    i come up ‘enfj’ and ‘enfp’ equally in the number of times i have been given this test; clearly i have a split personality somewhere in there, bah hahahahahahaha.

    thank you, xoxo buf

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  4. I’ve had the same “Please Understand Me” book since I was a teenager. I made the mistake of taking the test with an opinionated friend who forced the answers (i.e. “No, you totally are this, not that”) So initially, my personality came out slightly different than what I really am.

    INFP – apparently as a parent, I’m loving and will nurture creativity, etc… but the housework may not always get done. 🙂

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  6. I’m an ESFJ, so um – completely opposite to you in every way! LOL

    I love that we can all be great mums. We just have to work with our own strengths, and learn to tackle our weaknesses. I don’t think there is any “best” personality type for parenting, but we can all be the best version of ourselves.

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